Some things I have learned about being a Mom by Amanda

05 May 2011

As I was getting ready to ask moms to write posts for this week, my heart turned to those who might be reading that would give anything to be a mom.

And then I kept thinking of Amanda, and knew I needed to ask her to write for us today. We were roommates for a year in college, and she is simply and quietly just an amazing woman. Thank you, Amanda!


“Everywhere in nature we are taught the lessons of patience and waiting. We want things a long time before we get them, and the fact that we want them a long time makes them all the more precious when they come.”

-Joseph F. Smith-

Brezoff family - Nov

There were many hard years I didn’t think it would happen to me. Years where I had given up. Years my heart ached. Years I felt so alone. Years I yearned, hoped, prayed and dreamed that I would be granted the wish of my heart, the wish of becoming a mother. It seemed as if everywhere I turned someone else was making that exciting announcement that they were expecting or showing off their ultra-sound pictures. It was hard for me to understand how it could be so simple for others and for me so unattainable. After a lot of prayers, deep reflection and tearful conversations my husband and I came to realize that adoption was our answer.


And then finally, on a beautiful fall afternoon I received the phone call that our birthmother had just delivered a baby girl and that the placement of our daughter would be two days later. Words cannot explain the feelings I had in my heart the day Abby was placed in my arms. She was more beautiful and precious than I ever could have imagined. I was overwhelmed with emotion that day. I felt an intense love for this child and a deep appreciation for a young woman that gave me the greatest gift, the gift I had dreamed of for so very long, the gift of motherhood.


My husband and I were blessed again three years later to adopt our sweet baby boy, Boston, again so lovingly given to us by a beautiful birthmother that demonstrated unbelievable strength and faith. Boston’s birthmother is an amazing woman that I adore and feel so much love for. I believe her and I share a bond and love for Boston that is undeniable. Some say when a child is placed for adoption that the birthmother is giving up, taking the easy way out or must not love her child. I believe nothing could be farther from the truth. A birthmother shows the most selfless love by placing a child in the arms of another. I cherish the relationships I share with both our birthmothers and feel eternally indebted to them for what they have given for me.


Some days I cannot believe my children are mine, they are my little miracles. I look at them and realize they are direct answer to my prayers. I am so thankful I didn’t give up and learned to trust in the Lord. I am forever thankful for our beautiful birthmothers and their families. For their remarkable strength and unselfish choices that in turn gave me my sweetest blessings. They have taught me so much. When life gets tough, I often think of them and remember that I can do hard things. Adoption is not easy, not for either side, it is a journey of faith. I wouldn’t change my adoption experiences for anything. All the difficult years, all the tears and all the hurt and feeling so alone - it has all been well worth it to have two little kiddos that call me mommy!

Saturday, May 7th is Birthmother’s Day, it is recognized every year the day before Mother’s Day.


  1. I know Amanda personally and can confrim what a wonderful mother she is to her little blessings. Thank you Amanda for sharing this beautiful story, it was so heartfelt. It helps all of us to take a step back from our busy lives, and reflect on the joys of being a mother.

  2. The Adoption process not only blesses the lives of the BirthMother, and adopting family, but the extended families and and friends. I am grateful to be apart of such an amazing gift. Melissa, thank you for asking Amanda to do this. It was so much fun to look back at the pictures and feel the rush of emotion come over us as it did the day our amazing birthmothers placed these sweet children in our arms. Happy Birthmother's Day and Happy Mother's Day!

  3. Amanda thank you for sharing your story. I am a birthmom who placed my daughter with her family almost 12 years ago. Reading your words brings back all of the emotions I have. I too wouldn't change my adoption experience for anything. I have had such a positive experience and I love to see the other side of adoption. I have been married for 6 years and have a 3 year old daughter. I am so thankful for all that I have learned through this process.

  4. Amanda is my older sister + is quite amazing in every way!! She is such a beautiful woman inside + out while she is always a great example of motherhood. Her story always brings me to tears. I love her children, the birth mothers + our family. Love you tonz big sista!!

  5. Your family is beautiful and they are two very lucky children ...God Bless!!!

  6. What a beautiful story and what a beautiful family. When I saw the pics of your family before reading your story I thought how much your son looks like your husband and how much your daughter looks like you. Amazing. We also adopted, not a baby but a 12 year old girl from Russia (we were in our early fifties at the time) and it was and is the most wonderful experience that I would never change. Our daughter turned 25 Sat. and she has been a blessing every day of the almost 13 years we have had her.

  7. What a beautiful story! We have had many friends with similar stories. Currently, our youngest daughter's teacher is awaiting the arrival of the baby they are due to adopt in the summer.

  8. Sarah@Clover Lane1/16/14, 10:44 PM

    Amanda, what a beautiful story...and what gifts you were given by those generous unselfish mothers. Truly sweet little blessings, and I am so happy for you.

  9. As an adoptee...thank you for sharing this other side of Motherhood. Giving a child a life and love, is just as important as giving birth to them!


  10. What a wonderful post!! As a mom of 2 beautiful adopted daughters, I agree with everything Amanda said! Going through adoption is such a tender, bittersweet journey. You are so happy for yourself and to finally become a mom, but so sad for all the birthmom and her family feel and go through. It is miraculous to raise those sweet babies and have the inspiration and knowledge that everything is as it was supposed to be, it just all came about in a different way than you all would have planned. It truly teaches us that a loving Heavenly Father is in charge and that he loves each of us. Happy Birthmom and Mother's Day!!!

  11. Beautiful story ... thank you so much for sharing !! Your children are precious ... look so much like you and your husband, too! I, too, have been blessed with a son through adoption. The second the nurse placed him in my arms (we were in the delivery room), I finally understood why my getting pregnant wasn't meant to be !! Adoption is truly a "God thing," isn't it? Congrats on your gorgeous family. *Becca*

  12. I am one of Amanda's lucky birthmoms! I thank my Father in Heaven every day for leading Andrew and Amanda and myself to each other. Amanda is incredible, sweet, fun, creative and beautiful. She is exactly the mother I wish to be one day (that's why I picked her!). I know without a doubt that my little boy is exactly where he is supposd to be and in the family he is meant to be in. Knowing he is happy and healthy and LOVED makes any ounce of sadness on my part completely worth it. Thanks for being you, Amanda. You're the absolute BEST!

  13. Westinflorida1/16/14, 11:02 PM

    Thank you for so generously sharing your story. All of you are so blessed to have found each other. The genuine joy that you exude, demonstrated through your photographs and writing, and that of Cambria's comment show me a whole new meaning of Mother's Day that I had never imagined. I really and truly wish a happy Mother's Day weekend to you both! Much love...

  14. The love you have for your children shows in your faces. So glad your dreams were realized. Lucky children, lucky parents! I bet you didn't feel lucky during all your heartache, but look at what you have now. Great quote. Isn't patience what we all strive for?

  15. melissa*320 sycamore1/18/14, 2:16 PM

    Amanda! Just the pictures make me cry! Thank you for your beautiful words~I absolutely love that quote at the top as well. I love how you look at it as a gift from the birth mothers and from God. You are right, how hard that would be to put your baby in someone else's arms, but what a gift of love to everyone involved. Happy Mother's Day, cute girl!

  16. Beautiful babes, part of a beautiful family, born unselfishly of beautiful women.
    Amanda I couldn't agree more; Blessing a child with the gift of adoption is generous never selfish.

    Happy Mother's Day.

  17. So precious! Happy (belated) Mother's Day to you. I too have battled infertility and although we were blessed with twins through IVF, I feel God is really laying on my heart the miracle of adoption as the path to our next child. Still in prayer and discussion with my husband, but it's stories like this that continue to press upon my heart. You have a beautiful family and it's so wonderful to see God's handiwork through such gracious birthmothers. Thanks very much for sharing!


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